I lost my father when I was in fifth standard, a mere ten-year-old kid. While the experience of going to the burning ghat with my mother after waking up one day early in the morning was immensely traumatizing and had a severe impact on me, the incidents that have subsequently followed in my teen and early years of adulthood have not been quite pleasant either. I was severely bullied throughout secondary and senior secondary school, primarily owing to my “tomboyish” appearance. I simply refused to fit the bill of the perfect, bubbly, jolly girl society had kept rooted in its head. I lost my uncle (father’s elder sister) soon after that, followed by my cousin(his son) in a fateful bus accident. Last year, I lost a close friend in college to stage-IV cancer. Life has been anything but easy for me so far.
Hard times in life require a strong, level-headed approach and external support as well which makes getting through hard times a bit easier. Words of encouragement and positive thinking can indeed be very motivating during dire situations that arise in life. Chipping in a few words of encouragement for a friend going through hard times can be immensely beneficial for uplifting their morale, boosting their state of mind, and getting through hard times a holistic process of growth and upliftment for them as individuals.
Below mentioned are some steps you can undertake (on your own) so that going through difficult times becomes easier for you.
1. Acknowledge your emotions:
It is not either necessary or possible at all times to be in a happy or a jolly mood or to remain upbeat at all times and at all costs, i.e., at the expense of your mental health. It is very common for unprecedented situations to arise where you might feel your mental health is disturbed greatly and you have little choice but to deal with these situations. Getting through hard times involves acknowledging your emotions, going through the overflow of emotions that will inevitably occur once in a while, and dealing with these emotions (which can and will often seem to be unwanted) by channelizing them into any productive action of yours or any creative pursuit.
2. Assess the situation you are in, from an outsider’s perspective:
Does it still seem as bad? Chances are high that it does not. Why so? We all are self-centered at times, and this is a negative narcissistic trait to think that all that is happening to us is anything but good, we are going through the worst possible things in the world. But from a different approach/perspective, for example, that of an outsider who is looking into the situation, it might be that the situation seems a lot less tense or complicated and can actually seem to be something quite solvable. This will give you the incentive to actually start working on your way to solving your problems.
3. Talk and discuss the problem with someone you are comfortable enough:
Also, make sure that you trust the person enough while you open up to them. Chances are high that these people have gone through similar circumstances or situations as you have or are going through right now and will offer you correct or concrete solutions to overcome the problem. Their insights and guidance will help you a great deal indeed.
4. Look past your hardships:
Very often, the biggest mistake that we make is to make our difficulties and hardships incredibly difficult to overcome on our own. The first step to getting yourself through hard times is while acknowledging that you gotta overcome these difficulties, no matter what the circumstances may be.
5. Focus more on self-care:
Prioritize yourself. Self-love, self-care is the only mantra you can follow. A mere ten minutes of meditation and half an hour of power nap can work wonders. Remember, you can become productive at work only if you help yourself to become a better version of yourself.
One thing you must keep in mind, everyone heals differently. This is indeed crucial to note as the same process that worked for one human being might not work for another human being.